every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
ugly people sure do ruin things
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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