Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
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don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
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Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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