Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Send help, water and tortillas.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize