drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
