Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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