yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
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