Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
