let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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