hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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