i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
