Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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