I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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