Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(618): View more from Illinois

here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...

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(214): View more from Texas

Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.

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(614): View more from Ohio

Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(702): View more from Nevada

facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me

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(870): View more from Arkansas

What's the big deal? you guys fuck

(1-870): View more from Arkansas

3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times

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(804): View more from Virginia

Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.

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(708): View more from Illinois

I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?

(224): View more from Illinois

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?

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(815): View more from Illinois

He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."

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