I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"