I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
