But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize