he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
