I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
