Barsexuality is the new black.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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