So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
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