What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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