I want to have your abortion
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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