I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
