Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
