Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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