he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
