I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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