I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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