Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
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