I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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