Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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