I'd wear matching sweaters with you
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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