Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize