Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
