Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
