I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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