Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
you never un-have a 4some
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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