Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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