You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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