i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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