Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
