oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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