Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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