he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
whose parrot is this?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
