He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Can I color on your dick again?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
