everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
