my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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