Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
