You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
