P.S. I can't hear my feet
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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