Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize