How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
