I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
